The last Kid Nation of the season (and possibly ever) opens with an extended compilation of choice Kid Nation Moments. Oh Kid Nation. The times we've had. I hope you come back next fall, armed with crazier kids, some more Jared, and a more exciting dramatic arc. More on that later.
Day 38. Mike is up before everyone else to reflect on the time he's spent at Bonanza. He is shocked to find the Job Board ablaze. He wakes up the whole town and they mobilize. The dishabille Sophia and Greg come from the same direction, but I think I've been reading more into that than what is really there. Jared helps by using a small cup to help put out the fire, wisely remembering what the people came for: the peculiar penumbra of craziness and cuteness that only kids can pull off. Morningtime. Jonathan is there. At Mallory's request, he throws the Pioneer Journal into the embers. It seems that they are now truly a "Kid Nation;" that is, the producers will not tell them what to do for six hours or so. The empowered kids promptly loot the dry goods stores of candy, soda, and hats. Anjay does the funniest thing ever. Somebody please make a gif for me. Some disapprove (of the looting), so DK says that there will be a town meeting at dinner. Dinner?! What, you have tee-time? No time like the present, Council.
SHOWDOWN? NO-DOWN! All they take care of is the sundry business of the last gold star. It goes to Zach, who is touched (remember, he had his hissy-tantrum about 18 hours before). Back in Bonanza, Emilie causes a row-de-dow by wanting to sleep in the Yellow Girls' bunk. Even though they are are best friends and totally love her, Taylor, Kelsey, et al will not even let her sleep next to the chickens. When she objects (at first they let her but then told her to bug off), it starts off a big stupid fight that only Migle can break up.
After a nice snooze, the town convenes for dinner of gummy-looking macaroni and cheese. It is decided that they will all will clean up the trashed town the next morning. It take 20 minutes, just in time for Jonathan to get there (it is weird to see him in the kitchen). There's some challenge with mashed potatoes and tomatoes and they all win a big party and the opportunity to win one of three GIANT GOLD STARS! They are worth their weight in gold, it seems; that is $50,000 today but as Alex taught us last week that could change with time. Also the parents show up. YESSSS! We finally get a load of these parents, like Jared's (they look like nice normal people). DK's parents look to camera when he shows them the feet from the chickens the town has killed, which was very funny. Zach's Dad: "before you left I told you it was going to be a test of self-reliance for you, but it was really a test of self-reliance for us." AWW. What an only child Zach is.
TOWN MEETING! The council doles out the Big Gold Stars to Sophia (duh), Morgan (fair enough), and Migle (so that's why she's been shown so much lately). I suppose that these three embodied hard work, social cohesion, and growth, but this was not explained in the show. Morgan's father commends the Council (no dip, that $70,000 is going to cover the first semester of her college tuition!) and Greg impresses him with his sophistry.
The Kids make their goodbyes. Sophia says she loves Greg, but in that way like "oh, you knuckleknob. What am I going to do with you?" The show closes with a video montage of the Kids reflecting on their time there. They are proud of their Kid Nation.
Observations:
1. What are they going to do to Kid Nation 2 to make it a little less dull-minded as hell? Voting people off wouldn't work, but I cannot be bribed with golden stars. The lesson is: don't hire me to try and fix it.
2. I can't believe that Anjay got nothing. I also can't believe that Anjay looks exactly like his mom.
3. Pharaoh didn't get anything. Oh that bums me out.
4. On the other hand, Olivia did not get one, so I guess that balances out.
5. Other Big Gold Star choices: Anjay (intelligence tempered with the kidly desire to goof around; proves why children are not traditionally permitted to lead), Markelle (a pro), Jared (showmanship).
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
KID NATION 12: WHERE'S BONANZA, DUDE? (spoilers)
Kinda snoozy this week. Also the people I was watching with wouldn't shut up, so I probably missed 30% of it.
Another trademark Sophia "I am better than everybody" stunt opens the show. This time she is proving that sectioning off a part of the town center will make everyone want it. Most do, and Nathan (fave) objects most strongly because it doubles his walkin' across town time (an excellent point). The Council converges and learn that they have to go to a leadership seminar and leave Sophia in charge. Nathan (fave) objects because Sophia was not elected. Fair enough, but who cares? There's like 36 hours left.
Sophia proves to be a very good leader, it seems. The arcade is closed until the kids get their chores done, and she even praises them all on a job well done. Taylor mentions that she wishes Greg gets lost and is eaten by coyotes. Sophia is touched.
Meanwhile the Council has taken in with a Native American tribe who teach the kids about the importance of encouraging and being good role models for the younger ones. We cut to Alex and Jared, who are stealing some cow (bull?) bones. "Pelvis has left the building!," Jared exclaims. He apologizes, but I loved it.
SHOWDOWN! The kids all have to build houses for some animals. Guylan's parents, it turns out, are elephant trainers, so he has no trouble handling the alpaca. They get the reward in the nick-of-time, and have the option of a permanent memorial placed in Bonanza, or a hot-air balloon ride. Sophia picks the balloons (why not?), which is what all of the of the other kids seemed to want. The balloons show up the next morning. You couldn't have sprung for matching ones, CBS? It looked terrible. The Council returns just as the rides are wrapping up. Gold Star Nominations commence. Contenders include Migle, Alex, and Jared. Jared unwisely nominates himself, which basically puts him out of the running. Zach does as well. Some history: Zach was a contender before becoming a Council Leader, but was then out of the running for, like, six weeks. Zach gets choked up, because he's put a lot of work in and has desperately missed his family, and I guess Greg and Blaine laughed. Humiliated, Zach storms out and then storms back in to call them all assholes. DK is disgusted by Greg.
Town meeting! Sophia recommends that the arcade gets closed. Many object, including Colton, who always seems to get his good time ruined. Nonetheless, Greg decrees that the arcade must be locked up so they survive these last three days. Alex wins the Gold Star! He addresses the camera and says something to the effect that kids can do anything. He also proves that he is the smartest kid there by planning to not sell it (it's an investment metal). We see his family: they are not particularly excited or surprised by his win. I'll assume it's because they know he's a great kid. I'll also assume that when they said that "he's grown up now" they meant that "he's not a baby anymore" because I like Alex.
Next week: MAYBE LAST KID NATION EVER! SHOCKS AND SURPRISES ABOUND, I HAVE BEEN ASSSURED! TOCSINS ARE BEING SOUNDED! IT--ALL--COMES--DOWN--TO--THIS!
Another trademark Sophia "I am better than everybody" stunt opens the show. This time she is proving that sectioning off a part of the town center will make everyone want it. Most do, and Nathan (fave) objects most strongly because it doubles his walkin' across town time (an excellent point). The Council converges and learn that they have to go to a leadership seminar and leave Sophia in charge. Nathan (fave) objects because Sophia was not elected. Fair enough, but who cares? There's like 36 hours left.
Sophia proves to be a very good leader, it seems. The arcade is closed until the kids get their chores done, and she even praises them all on a job well done. Taylor mentions that she wishes Greg gets lost and is eaten by coyotes. Sophia is touched.
Meanwhile the Council has taken in with a Native American tribe who teach the kids about the importance of encouraging and being good role models for the younger ones. We cut to Alex and Jared, who are stealing some cow (bull?) bones. "Pelvis has left the building!," Jared exclaims. He apologizes, but I loved it.
SHOWDOWN! The kids all have to build houses for some animals. Guylan's parents, it turns out, are elephant trainers, so he has no trouble handling the alpaca. They get the reward in the nick-of-time, and have the option of a permanent memorial placed in Bonanza, or a hot-air balloon ride. Sophia picks the balloons (why not?), which is what all of the of the other kids seemed to want. The balloons show up the next morning. You couldn't have sprung for matching ones, CBS? It looked terrible. The Council returns just as the rides are wrapping up. Gold Star Nominations commence. Contenders include Migle, Alex, and Jared. Jared unwisely nominates himself, which basically puts him out of the running. Zach does as well. Some history: Zach was a contender before becoming a Council Leader, but was then out of the running for, like, six weeks. Zach gets choked up, because he's put a lot of work in and has desperately missed his family, and I guess Greg and Blaine laughed. Humiliated, Zach storms out and then storms back in to call them all assholes. DK is disgusted by Greg.
Town meeting! Sophia recommends that the arcade gets closed. Many object, including Colton, who always seems to get his good time ruined. Nonetheless, Greg decrees that the arcade must be locked up so they survive these last three days. Alex wins the Gold Star! He addresses the camera and says something to the effect that kids can do anything. He also proves that he is the smartest kid there by planning to not sell it (it's an investment metal). We see his family: they are not particularly excited or surprised by his win. I'll assume it's because they know he's a great kid. I'll also assume that when they said that "he's grown up now" they meant that "he's not a baby anymore" because I like Alex.
Next week: MAYBE LAST KID NATION EVER! SHOCKS AND SURPRISES ABOUND, I HAVE BEEN ASSSURED! TOCSINS ARE BEING SOUNDED! IT--ALL--COMES--DOWN--TO--THIS!
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