Owls

These dudes are pretty cool. I think it's funny how they look persnickety and annoyed and all like "pardon me, I'm sure*." Fun fact: these traits are why they're known as "Nature's Pedants," and frequently outfitted with mortarboards in graphic representation. If you're interested in other depictions of owls, then look over here. It's my favorite site about owls that does not use the letter "w."

*Or if you will, "motherfucker, what the fuck?"

Shooting Stars

Yesterday I saw five shooting stars in the middle of the afternoon. I think so. It looked exactly like this.

I'd like to take it as a good omen, but after this week...hoo. I don't know. I'm inclined to believe the opposite.

-WANT! The Yo, Let's Tangoes is one of my favorite bands, and I've wanted to go to their Hanukkah shows for years.

-Delia's started sending me catalogs again. ??? Wouldn't I be too old for Delia's? On the other hand, I do look very young. The other day a butcher at Harris Teeter's advised me to "stay in school;" I am probably older than he is.

-I finished reading Infinite Jest yesterday. Here's how goddamn bananas this book is: there is no scene in which the two most prominent characters (Hal and Don) meet, or even move in the same circles, but it's offhandedly referenced in the first ten pages (the book is 1000+ pages long) that sometime before the brief first section (which is chronologically the last scene) and the rest of the book that they meet, join up, and try to resolve the central conflict*. And you HAVE to realize this to figure out what happens, plot-wise. BUH???

*This is terrible, terrible writing, I know, but I don't want to spoil anything.

My Favorite Simpsons Joke

(after all these years)

Christmas

(more coming later)

Hm.

Is it just me, or does this seem to be going in reverse order? Aren't the most recent things usually at the top of the minifeed?

Poolesville Grinches!

DEAR PRESIDENT BUSH

I understand that you're rather concerned about your legacy these days. Well, Baz Luhrmann might make The Great Gatsby. If you can stop this happening, I guarantee this will totally rehabilitate your image. Even the torture parts.

Lol wtf

Barack Obama adds to flickr's nom nom nom pool.

"THE LEONARD LOPATE SHOW" TODAY

I'm sure you'll agree that it as almost absurdly tailored to my interests.

GET APPRISED

Wikipedia's list of common misconceptions.

(via Cynical-C Blog)

"INHERENT VICE"-GATE ROLLS ON

Pynchon himself to blame for that cover.

(via Conversational Reading)

Thank You, Internet

I am so glad I am alive right now. Any other time in the past and this probably never would have reached me.

(that's pac-man, by the way)

The Year-End Approval Matrix Is Out

Guess which thing I REALLY disagree with?

(it's not the puppycam)

Here's What Is Going On

If Charlie Parker Was a Gunslinger, There'd Be a Whole Lot of Dead Copycats

Puppystalker

WONDERGLEN

Impossible Cool

The IT Crowd is BACK!

TOP CHEF IS ON TONIGHT

I might be live-twittering this. I need to use my twitter more. Anyway, check at 10 to see!

DC Sniping

I have a largely half-assed theory that DC is culturally closer to Maryland than it is to Virginia (possibly because MD never dick-moved DC by retrocessing land). Well, here I've gone and got myself some proof, sort-of: a search for "DC" on StateStats has Maryland leading Virginia by a wide margin. Likewise, DC bests Virginia by a significant amount in searches for "Maryland."

EMBARRASSING

Every single one of these missed connections is about me. I always thought it would be sort of sweet to have a missed connection about me but twenty-seven makes me feel hot and ashamed.

More Text Conversations Between My Brother and I

Joe: Colbert called out kanye, omg nice
Me: Kanye West is the Stephen Colbert of hip hop
Joe: Stephen Colbert is the Stephen Colbert of hip hop. R u forgetting about his debut album The Colbert Rapport?

Wow. Wow. Wow.

Glory at Sea. Directed by Benh Zeitlin. It's a half hour long but holy hell is it worth it.

Best IMDB Profile Pictures

John Riggins

David Wain

My Kind of Math

Pecan pie cosahedron

Adopt a Turkey

Think of it like carbon offsets.

Thomas Pynchon Has Written Some Shitty Beach-Reading Novel

I guess.

They Both Suck '08

Write-in votes from Duval County, Florida. Right now there are two people in Florida wondering who the other one was who voted for Bill Nye.

Also funny: the vote for "Nothing (anarchy)." Why are you voting at all, ding-dong?

The Funniest Line I Have Ever Read in the New York Times

"A full 60 pages of his new manuscript are devoted to debunking the Emersonian view of Franklin as “America’s first self-made man” and replacing it with a portrait of Franklin as a “commoner,” a man whose defining talent was for absorbing, repurposing and synthesizing the culture around him, like some colonial M.C."

Or perhaps anywhere.

The Roots to be Jimmy Fallon's House Band?

That's kind of awesome.

Google Reader Dredgage pt. II

Turns out Proust is funny. Huh. Who knew?

100 Boyfriend Qualities

Stephen Fry in America

"Tell him to tell them to take the eggs out of their potato salad."

--My mom, on being told that Lee Atwater was a principle investor in Red, Hot & Blue.

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

Lee Atwater was one of the original people behind Red, Hot & Blue, the barbecue restaurant.

Eww.

If you're one of my friends, then this clip of Keith Olbermann talking about the passing of Prop 8 is probably preaching to the choir. Please watch it nonetheless.

Google Reader Dredgage

Hey Britain. We cool?

Wow.

Twyla Tharp on creativity

YUP YUP

I really highly recommend this: The Acousmatic Theater Hour with Karinne and Jason G, a brand-new show on WFMU which features radio plays and found audio.

Oh, and just so you don't think I'm smart or something, here's a picture of a burger shoe:



Ha ha ha

Heads Up

Boogie Man, the documentary about Republican political consultant/strategist Lee Atwater, is airing on PBS tomorrow at 9 p.m.

Dave Chappelle will be interviewing James Lipton on Inside the Actors Studio tonight at 8 p.m.

Am I just being cynical, or is there something off-putting about this? Like it's saying, "you're welcome, black people!"

Overweight Women Have More Sex

This is a little old, but I still want to bring it up. I think that Jezebel has it right: attractiveness doesn't have much to do with weight. I lost a fair bit of weight over the past year and was disappointed to find several tens of pounds later that, well...let's just say that it didn't augment much.

Messaging Merriment

A text exchange between my brother and I today:

Me: There needs to be a black james bond
Joe: Yes only problem there aren't any black people named james*
Me: Uh ll cool j? fool
Joe: His name is cool james not james

*Some context: my brother is so disgusted by racism that he not only once quit a job because his boss told racist jokes, he literally WALKED OUT once he heard the guy doing it. Without saying a word or looking back.

My Mom Is Often the Best

"Thank God you were born that Election Day, because I hated them both (Reagan and Mondale)."

(see, because of me, she couldn't vote)

In Case You Don't Like Puppies

"Giraffes," from last weekend's SNL:



And "Sloths," from a couple of seasons ago:

Because I Like You

When Kerry lost in '04, I stayed up all night looking at pictures of puppies and kittens. It was pretty cathartic. And while it's looking pretty good right now for Obama (who I am supporting--have I mentioned this at all?), I have just been sent a live feed of puppies, so if worst comes to worst, well...I highly recommend it.

(they look like akitas, to boot, a breed which I can aver--owning, as I do, two of them--are the best damn dogs around)

Lincoln on Writing

" Writing-- the art of communicating thoughts to the mind, through the eye -- is the great invention of the world. Great in the astonishing range of analysis and combination which necessarily underlies the most crude and general conception of it -- great, very great in enabling us to converse with the dead, the absent, and the unborn, at all distances of time and of space; and great, not only in its direct benefits, but greatest help, to all other inventions. . . . Its utility may be conceived, by the reflection, that to it we owe everything which distinguishes us from savages. Take it from us, and the Bible, all history, all science, all government, all commerce, and nearly all social intercourse go with it."

"Obama's Scary"

I hope this lady got egged so much that she spent all Saturday morning scraping omelets off her roof.

1. Elizabeth Hasselbeck is the worst. If you cracked her open you'd find nothing but spiders and yellow smoke.

2. I can't catch a break. Or so it seems, but I'm only basing that on my experiences from early November 1984 to now.

3. I've never seen the "'n Chips" one before. I love it!

4. What's worse: the word "yuppies" used today (still!) or yuppies talking about how great The US Office is?

There's ALREADY Shenanigans

I Saw "W"

Oliver Stone chose to make Karl Rove (SPOILER) a total little dork nerd. There's even one scene where he's excited and he's hopping up and down like he just found out that his mom is letting him do cosplay at an anime convention. It's hilarious and unexpected, but not totally incongruous, if his Proust Questionnaire is to be believed*. Imagine how depressed I got when I found out that he really likes Borges too.

*And why wouldn't it?**

**Because he's Karl Rove.

The Guy That Ate the Big Burger

My mother's side of the family comes from the same small Pennsylvania town as this guy. My grandmother agreed to marry my grandfather on the condition that he get her the fuck out of Uniontown (not with that language, I assume). Other natives include the Big Mac, Secretary of State George Marshall (of the Marshall Plan), and a surprising number of moderately popular silent film actresses.

FWIW, "burger hangover" actually results in intestinal scarring, mild to moderate lycanthropy, and permanent pelvic misalignment.

This Woman Is Ludicrous

THE EAGLES?!? Hellll nawwww.

John Cleese on Sarah Palin

(the american-ness of his accent now is really weird)

This Palin Character

Seriously, how is this lady* getting away with calling Obama un-American when she got elected mayor and governor because of her ties to the Alaskan Successionist movement?

*har

Tumblr Crossover!

1. The closest thing I have to a vice these days*

2. Heh heh heh. Finally, Philadelphia comes in handy. It was naive of the campaign to think that PHILLY of all places would behave them simple selves no matter how they felt about the election. So, ATTENTION PHILLIES FANS: IT'S OK IF YOU WIN THE WORLD SERIES NOW. AFTER WATCHING THIS VIDEO I DECIDED THAT I WON'T MIND IF YOU BEAT THE DEVIL RAYS.

3. What will happen to Palin when/if McCain loses? Will she receive some of the blame, or has she been permanently hoisted into the Republican firmament, and we can look forward to seeing her in 2012?

*Probably not true. Probably.

"I Actually Did Know..."

I was wondering about this. It really rubbed me the wrong way.

Finale -1

9:02--Kenley was "sabotaged." She's one of those.

9:05--Did Tim just say "snatch shot"??

9:09--I HATE LEANNE'S SKIRTS

9:21--Kenley's "fab" dress looks like hotel drapes.

9:33--Gol, I love Leanne's bridesmaid dress. Feels kind of like a beach wedding.

9:58--Not very surprised. Jerell's work always felt a bit...slapped together. Or, "hog wild."

Overall: ZZZZZ.

Dogs Are Stupid

You idiots can't vote.

1. I took my LSATs today. I did them at MC, and there was some woman standing by the North Entrance holding a sign of an aborted baby that read "McCain/Palin '08." Maybe it's because I was especially attuned that morning (here's to hopin' oh god) to logical fallacies, but I wasn't sure from the sign alone if McCain is pro or con aborted babies.

2. At the test I was seated next to one of the cutest guys I've ever seen in my life. After dropping me off*, my mom spoke with him as he was coming in (she is basically the opposite of me). She said that he said he had gone to Charleston and that he was "very nervous."

3. "An American Carol" came out yesterday. From reviews I gather that Trace Adkins plays the Angel of Death and himself. So then in the universe of this movie the Harvester of Souls took a break from his duties to write "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk." And then tour with it. I'll tell you more once I see this (I'm waiting for IMAX).

*We were going to Guapo's later, which then became Checker's without anybody asking me.

PR EYE!

Before I saw this week's episode of Project Runway, I had naturally assumed that Kenley was America's Greatest Monster. On the show she has appeared whiny, petty, rude, self-absorbed, and worst of all, her shit is played. But then this week she revealed that people hated her because she was the daughter of a tugboat captain. Because of LSAT study I did not see this when it was first broadcast, but now I have a pretty good guess as to what that reedy exhalation I heard at about 9:15 p.m. on Wednesday: it was America's collective gasp of understanding.

What else happened that I remember? Michael Kors nearly pulled his face off during the deliberations. Nina fared little better. Heidi talked about lacking taste while wearing a blazer over a spangled bra. Everyone wahhed and crybabied their way into another chance at Bryant Park (sort of). Leanne either can't work a camera or decided to be super-arty with her photos. Everyone explained how they come from Circumstances so THEY HAVE TO WIN! Jerell is skinny as hell (or as my ancestors might have said, haaaale). Isn't "model" the worst job ever? Most get paid nothing to wear the stupidest clothes by mediocre designers. It's like punishment for being stunning. Of course, most creative-type professions look like punishment unless for those at the very top.

Next week: another liveblog!!!!!!!

Overheard

"If you would have told me in January 2001 that the next president of the United States would be a black guy, I would have thought, 'oh God, no, Alan Keyes is going to be president.'"

Bad News

Was in Quince Orchard/Gaithersburg today. There were McCain/Palin signs EVERYWHERE.

I have a bad feeling.

My Safari's Recent Searches

unbearable lightness of being rotten tomatoes
muscle knot
new york magazine blog
quince orchard
strong hands violin
pez
"shit sucks" idiocracy
rockville pike
hershey's
silence kit meaning

Just the other day I was thinking that James Franco is this generation's Paul Newman.

Remember When I Called the Palin Pick "Cynically Sexist"?

Ta-Nehisi Coates does it even better. As usual!

Eclipse's Larisa Shepitko Collection

Just saw both of the movies in here and wowowowowow. What a talent. "Two Masterpieces" indeed.

Thoughts

I had a whole rack of 'em.

1. The second I saw Bruno on the runway I realized that HE would have made the perfect judge for the season finale (spoiler alert: it is not him).

2. Whatever god, force, or Eternal Way is responsible for turning James Taylor from this to this is, if not of hell, certainly hell-affiliated somehow.

3. Vermont Law School is so pretty and cool.

4. FINALLY!

5. KRISPY KREME MOLECULAR GASTRONOMY MILKSHAKE EWW BARF

So How Many Steps Back Is This For Women?

We're up to 80 or 90, right?

A Startling Equation

50 Cent+Freddie Mercury=My Dad

Project Runway Liveblog

My first one!

9:09 p.m.--This is not looking good. Shouldn't "pop" be the easiest thing in the world to do for Kenley? It's so general, and she's a cute girl. And just dress Leanne like M.I.A. Same ballpark.

9:24 p.m.--Tim said ONE THING. Kenley is past nuts. She's truck nutz.

9:35 p.m.--Did you see on the Emmys last weekend where Tina Fey thanked her parents for raising her to have confidence disproportionate to her looks and talents? I think it's actually true of Kenley. That or, you know. Truck nutz.

9:41 p.m.--HOLD ON, Kenley, HOLD ON. You're saying that Leanne--our Leanne--is not very hip hop?

9:43 p.m.--Kenley thinks LL Cool J is King of Hip Hop. I wish to god I knew what she thinks hip hop is.

9:44 p.m.--Hey! Caps won! Go Caps!

9:51 p.m.--"a woman going out to eat ribs." Michael Kors is a gem.

9:53 p.m.--Who keeps letting Leonardo DiCaprio do a Southern accent? He couldn't be worse at it.

9:55 p.m.--Ha ha. 88%. If you mess with the Gunn you gonna get shot.

9:56 p.m.--What? Korto? Man, they really had me going with Jerrell.

9:58 p.m.--UGH WHATEVER.

Karl Rove on Whether or Not Palin Will Make a Good President

"I don't know."

Looking Up Your Name on Urban Dictionary

A girl's name in which the height of its popularity was in the 1980's. The majority of females named Melissa were born with permanent sticks up their asses, and are therefore extremely uptight the majority of the time. Thereby anyone with an attitude, or literally a stick up their butt, can be described as being a Melissa. There rest of us are o.k.

Best Summer Comedy

My God, I was starting to think the only one!

My Digital Camera Has a Message for Me

"Hey, do you know who you look like? Mickey Rourke. Like, Mickey Rourke NOW."

WHAAAT?

No. No. Hell no.

At the insistence of the McCain campaign, the Oct. 2 debate between the Republican nominee for vice president, Gov. Sarah Palin, and her Democratic rival, Senator Joseph R. Biden Jr., will have shorter question-and-answer segments than those for the presidential nominees, the advisers said. There will also be much less opportunity for free-wheeling, direct exchanges between the running mates.

Picking Palin has been the one of the most cynically sexist moves in American political history (which says A LOT).

Ladies, Let's Have a Party

Free Cat Food

Bad economy got you down? 9Lives is giving away a three pound bag of cat food. So at least your cats don't have to starve.

Election's Over

Obama wins. All done. Let's focus on something else now.

Y'all Can't Stop Me Postin' Bout Project Runway

1. Kenley is so annoying. And I hated that belt.

2. Less loving the nerd-bitch side of Leanne.

3. I only saw the commercial for Top Design but yo what happened to Jeffery Sebelius? It looks like he stole Michael Phelps's mustache.

4. Next week is going to be so amazing. "We're not going to tell her that's not hip hop." HA HA HA!

Wow

This was a bit prescient. I'm not going to talk about David Foster Wallace's death here, except to say that you might be able to guess from my use of words like "ludic" and my occasional use of footnotes how much his writing meant to me. Anything else would be too raw and probably too long, and certainly trite.

SOMEBODY DRIVE ME TO CHICAGO

(it would be a cruelty not to, especially after I read this last weekend)

Free Cookie

From Kashi. Who is your best blog friend today?

Query

Is it unreasonable or (not my phrase) "weird as shit" to be reticent to force yourself on other people, in order to befriend them?

Pupusas

Let's hear it for pupusas!

Stalinist Speaks Out Against Panda

My dogg Slavoj Zizek on Kung Fu Panda. Also The Dark Knight, skiing, and Grand Theft Auto.

AV Club's Old Cult Canon

The Old Cult Canon: 16 cult films that paved the way for the new cult canon

(bolded are the ones I've seen)

1. Freaks
2. Pink Flamingos
3. Rocky Horror Picture Show
4. Eraserhead
5. Aguirre, The Wrath of God
6. Night of the Living Dead
7. Two Lane Blacktop
8. The Harder They Come
9. El Topo
10. Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
11. Enter the Dragon
12. Performance
13. Suspiria
14. Wizards
15. Plan Nine from Outer Space
16. Repo Man

(again, not awesome)

I Totally Lied

I am going to do more posts about Project Runway.

1. Leanne is the ur-Nerd Bitch and I fucking love it.

2. I missed last season for some reason (either it started when I was still at school, where we didn't get Bravo, or I flaked because season 3 was so boring) and never got to see the fabulous little motherfucker Christian Siriano. Oh well. Maybe they'll rerun that season.

3. Somehow Blayne managed to grow on me. He's the type of person who you can't stand but then you get to know them a little and they wear you down so much that you find yourself defending them over and over again until you realize that if you met yourself from the past your former self would disgustedly wonder "who the fuck are you?" Not that I ever liked his work or the "-licious."

4. Terri's dress looked like the couch in my mom's parlor with a currant tarp draped on it. Kenley's was still worse.

5. They should have shown Keith on his lollerblades when he heard that (SPOILER) Terri got knocked off.

6. A few months ago I think I saw Wendy Pepper riding around Poolesville in an SUV. It's possible: she lives in Middleburg, and this woman had a crabbity soreass look on her face.

7. Leanne's etsy page. Really beautiful.

Amurrican Pride

I'll do much better on this one!

1. Twinkies
2. NY Style Pizza
3. Sushi
4. Shrimp and Grits
5. Muffuletta
6. Banana Bread
7. Chocolate Chip Cookies
8. Fish tacos
9. Root Beer Float
10. In and Out Burger
11. Garbage Plate
12. Fried Chicken
13. Half Smoke
14. Lobster Boil
15. Apple Pie
16. French Dip/Italian Beef
17. Funyuns
18. Coca Cola
19. Eggs Benedict
20. Blueberry Muffins
21. Buttermilk Biscuits and Gravy
22. Shrimp Po’ Boy
23. Ambrosia Salad
24. Ovaltine
25. Lasagna
26. Western Omelet
27. Sweet Potato Pie
28. Tuna Casserole
29. Tater Tots
30. M&Ms
31. Cheerios
32. Wine IN Napa
33. Jambalaya
34. Cuban Sandwich
35. Crab Cakes
36. Cheeseburger
37. Pork Rinds
38. Baked Alaska
39. Egg Nog
40. Pigs in a Blanket
41. Tennessee BBQ
42. Apple Cider
43. Thin Mints
44. Monkey Bread
45. Chicken and Dumplings
46. Mashed Potatoes
47. Matzo Ball Soup
48. Jim Beam
49. NY Bagel
50. Cornbread
51. Frosty
52. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups
53. Cranberry Sauce
54. Kettle Corn
55. Downtown Mahattan
56. Rocky Road Ice Cream
57. Fluffernutter Sandwich
58. Cool Whip
59. Black and White Cookies
60. Pierogis
61. Rotisserie Chicken
62. French Toast
63. Chocolate Milk
64. Fried Green Tomatoes
65. Cobb Salad
66. Baby back ribs
67. Cup of Coffee
68. Cotton Candy
69. Bologna
70. Corn Dogs
71. Cheesecake
72. Pecan Pie
73. Scrapple
74. Philly Cheesesteak
75. Old Bay
76. Chicken Fried Steak
77. Rocky Mountain Oysters
78. Black Eyed Peas
79. Potato salad
80. Chili
81. BLT Sandwich
82. Egg Salad
83. Macaroni and Cheese
84. Red beans and rice
85. Mongolian BBQ
86. Hot fudge sundae
87. Red Velvet Cake
88. Sour Cream and Onion Chips
89. Bacon, Egg and Cheese Sandwich
90. Chicken Fingers
91. Mrs. Butterworth Syrup
92. Shirley Temple
93. Meatloaf
94. Grape Kool-Aid
95. Black Licorice
96. Buffalo Wings
97. Pulled Pork Sandwich
98. Budweiser
99. Peeps
100. Pop Tarts
101. Green bean casserole

(via here)

New Meme

Omnivore's 100

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

(I don't think I did very well)

I Can Relate To This

About every other day from 6 a.m. to 7 a.m.

I Don't Think I Care for Michael Cera Anymore

You heard me.

Time to Get Political

Forget the Iraq War, the culture of giddy anti-intellectualism, and well, basically everything. America's most egregious shame of the aughts has been the continued failure to recognize the greatness of Sloan. Especially in the face of "Who Taught You to Live Like That?"

Pumpkin Spice Hershey's Kisses

They are even better than Starbucks's Pumpkin Spice Latte.

(much nutmeggier)

Open Letter

Dear Old People Who Are In Charge of Their Business's Website,

I know that when you went to b-school back in the early 1980s the internet was barely a gleam in the eyes of some nerds in northern California, and you're totally unprepared to develop this sort-of new medium into another means of trying to trick young people out of their money.

I understand.

But you must stop putting audio--or god forbid, video clips--on your sites. Young people often listen to music while they are on their computers, and it really pisses me off when I am trying to claim my Quiznos coupon and listen to "Woody Allen on Comedy" to have to have to stop and find the "Audio Off" button.

It's just what how we use it. Keep your site simple, easy to navigate and load, and free of bells and whistles (literally).

(btw (not you, old people, I'm done with you), this Woody Allen on Comedy thing is amazing; it's hilarious how even back then your more artful comedians--Woody Allen, Jonathan Winters--were annoyed with and shit on the popular, lowest common denominator ones like Jackie Gleason and Jack Benny)

Oooh, Maybe I Should Rethink My Avocation

Writers who've committed suicide

Because It Bears Re-Asking

Why does coastal North Carolina support Washington, DC, area sports teams?

(it's like finding a new sibling!)

((one that really likes confederate flags and ron paul))

Jerk Does a Thing

Some nerd think that Poe's body should be moved from Baltimore to Philadelphia. Apparently Philadelphia's reputation is richly deserved.

This Looks Amazing

Wait, what does "amazing" mean again? Same as "awful" and "embarrassing," right?

Also, were people really clamoring for more Kat Dennings after "40 Year-Old Virgin"? I mean in a way not related to her boobs. I have been trying to forget about that scene where she's shrieking and crying at Catherine Keener for three years. For me it's up there with Salo on my list of upsetting moments in movies.

And is this how Michael Cera is going to go down? From Arrested Development, and now "Superbad," "Juno," and "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist." And the future don't look too good neither.

I want to punch that "h" on "Norah."

The Only Project Runway Season 5 Post I Will Make

Leanne is going to take this HANDILY. I knew that the second I saw this:



She and Korto are about ten miles past the others.

My Mom Thinks...

looks like

APB

This one has gone out on all of my media platforms: the twitter, the tumblr, and now the blogger (I will probably not post it on Facebook because the stupid news feed forces people to see it).

Anyway: I am in the mood for some flan. Please, somebody: make me a flan.

I Know Where The Summer Goes

Or so claims Belle & Sebastian. I, personally, have no idea. What have I done? I think I read a bunch of books and watched even more movies. I turned my family on to Freaks and Geeks. I had an infertility scare. I again considered becoming a doctor, which I initially scrapped because my biology teacher loathed me for being "poor" (I wasn't, my dad had just died and me lookin' cool wasn't at the top of anyone's must-do list--even mine) even though I was always the #1 student in class. I started a bunch of short stories and then got depressed and did not finish them. I edited my short film together (to keep the theme going, I decided once and for all not to go to film school, yes, because I am a loser who is not good enough wah boo hoo). I received many backhanded compliments about my weight loss. I was able to start running again. I revived this blog. I enjoyed "Pineapple Express" more than everyone in the world, apparently. I got a photo sold, sort of. I got into Rutgers Law and told them "no thanks right now." I saw a Nationals game in their new stadium (and was reminded of how much I love DC). I realized that I am approaching fluency with my French. And several dozen other things I am sure I am forgetting. Oh! And how could I forget the inexorable press on one's heart that is the feeling of time slipping, slipping away from you. That kept happening a lot!

A good alternate title for this post would be "Fun with Giant Blocks of Texts."

WANT

GRAAAAINS

This Is Dope

Only $12!

I'm Done

Well, I've decided not to go to Starbucks again. That is, I'm never going to order a mixed drink from them. You can only order a no-sugar 200 calorie drink and receive instead one of the ones that they haul out on the Today show to show why people are fat (which in their defense is easily mistaken for the one I ordered) so many times before you have to tell those greedy corporate fuckers to fuck off (like I should have done in the first place). At least it's not like the time the barista called me a liar.

Barista: (calling out order) Grande skinny vanilla latte.

Me: Oh, I didn't order a vanilla. I ordered a hazelnut.

Barista: (smiling condescendingly) No, you ordered a vanilla.

Me: I'm pretty sure I didn't.

Barista: No, you did. Fine! I'll make another one.

Thing is, I would never order a vanilla one. I think they are boring. And it wasn't even like I was thinking of one and maybe it accidentally popped out of my mouth. If that had been the case, I would have asked for an Omar from The Wire Macchiato. And that time was not even as bad as the guy who made fun of me as I was walking out because I did not hear him exactly when he first called out the order and I asked him to repeat it. Seriously, guy: I hope your life is as miserable as you deserve.

I've made this declaration before and then been sucked back in. So it remains to be seen how long this lasts. If it doesn't, I'll be sure to post about it, and whatever excuse I've made to myself to justify my turn-around.

Awesome Baby Takes a Stand

Today my brother took a bad hit at his football practice and ended up breaking his thumb and bruising his shoulder (he's otherwise fine, and right now flying high on vicodin). I went with him and my mom to the emergency room (not really necessary, but had the day off anyway, so why not give moral support?). While we were in the waiting room I saw a mother and her twin toddler sons (all of whom appeared fine). She was trying to keep them entertained, but had apparently not anticipated what had brought her there and had no toys to occupy them, so she resorted to trying to amuse them with whatever was stuck in the stroller's under-bin. One of these things was a McCain '08 bumper sticker, and upon given this to play with, the baby looked at it, then promptly threw it into a nearby garbage can.

Ahem

I've started updating my tumblr again. It'll feature odd bits of internet ephemera. Linked at your left, there.

Come On, Lasty!

The Washington Nationals don't have many league leaders, but they do have one in the category that illustrates how well a guy takes a beating. In that regard, center fielder Lastings Milledge is better than almost any other player in the league. Thirteen times this year -- including three times in the last week -- Milledge has been hit by pitches, second most in the National League.

NEWS OF THE WORLD

1. If I had a literature blog, I would call it "News of the Word."

2. "Every word was once a poem." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

3. You can get certified online by the Red Cross for first aid and CPR.

4. What Is Cinema? available online (well, partly).

Dear America

If you do not elect Barack Obama, I am done with y'all. I'm-a be sick of y'all's shit, and seriously: I may pull up stakes.

Do the right thing. This time it's very easy. It's not like 1989 and you have to throw a trash can through Sal's like Mookie did. You just have to select "Barack Obama" on your Diebolds.

Do the right thing. Own your legacy. Remake your legacy. You're Americans, for Christ's sake.

Meatatarians

Wendy's has established itself as a major figure in the vanguard of exploiting male insecurities.

David Gordon Green Is a Great Man

Look what he done.

Goodbye Blue Joeses

My brother is leaving for college tomorrow. He's starting as a freshman at the University of Maryland, where he was accepted to the Smith Business School. He's also a member of the wrestling team.



We're very proud. Today we went to SuperT(arget) for the last round of shopping. I tagged along to offer my expertise, like "Tide pens are useful. Febreeze too." And, "yeah, he will probably need trash bags." See, I'm indispensable. The total there came to several hundred dollars, so we went for lunch to Ruby Tuesday's instead of the planned Blue Ridge Grill (give us a break, my mom's got college to pay for). I've only been to RT's once, when my old roommates took me, and evidently they've gone upscale since then. This means square plates and low lighting. My brother said that it made him feel like a Top Chef judge. I had a tomato basil quiche in a puff pastry which was actually really good (though it's hard to screw up quiche for me). I'm really sorry if this is boring but damn that quiche was good.

It isn't possible that he is going to college. I was just there, and he is just a baby. Oh god, it's happening. Age. Roiling vicissitudes of time, foaming against itself.

Anyway, if you are at Ruby Tuesday's, I can recommend the quiche.

Diese Scheiße Ist Bananen

1. THEY ARE MAKING A SEQUEL TO "HAPPINESS"

2. I just found out that Wale is from QUINCE ORCHARD. We probably go to the same Starbucks, Fuddruckers, and bubble tea/pho place.

Phelps/Li'l Wayne on SNL Premiere: My Thoughts

Oh, Michael Phelps. Who told you this was a good idea? No athlete has ever done a remotely tolerable hosting job, and you do not even have a funny mustache (anymore) like Mark Spitz.

I hope, for everyone's sake, that Phelps finally eats too many pancakes or boxes of pasta and gets a tummyache, leaving Lil Wayne to take over. And also Li'l Wayne writes the whole thing.

(I would seriously pay NYC movie ticket money to watch that)

I Know I've Been Saying This A Lot Lately

But this is the best thing ever.

Richard Dawkins Reads His Hate Mail

If this was an hour long show on HBO I would watch every episode.

The AV Club on Scharpling & Wurster

http://www.avclub.com/content/blog/portraits_of_awesomeness_2?utm_source=avclub_rss_daily

The Best Show on WFMU is my favorite thing forever.

Summer Heights High

Very very funny Australian show from last year. Coming to America (HBO) in November.

Part one:



Part two:



Part three:

"My momma loved me but she died."

I finally saw Hud after reading this intriguing post. It's not half wrong.

I Have 75 Days Until My 24th Birthday

What can I do between now and then to mark this time?

British People Try to Figure Out America

http://chilled.cream.org/boards/index.php?topic=18766.0

I find this sort of thing fascinating, because I don't really get America either.

Report: Being a Woman Often Sucks

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/08/22/AR2008082203350.html?nav=rss_email/components

Joe Biden

Yesterday I was boredly poking around Wikipedia and I saw this on the page for the Genesis song "Land of Confusion" (having recalled the video from my nightmares):

"Land of Confusion" was Delaware Senator Joe Biden's campaign song during his brief run for President in 1987.

I'm tempted to read it now as a sign. Anyway, right now I'm happy with the choice. Really happy, actually. I'm sure that something will come along to piss me off, but right now, I'm so pleased that it makes me like Obama even more than I already did. And, since Biden's a good Delaware boy, he knows how great Rehoboth Beach is. That's a special club (so far the only other members are Tim Gunn and that guy on QVC who crosses his eyes every time he takes a bite of something).

Remember When I Blogged About My Favorite Things?

This eclipses all of them:

http://www.zazzle.com/doctor_who_cats_poster_print-228406097466018977

(for some reason it makes me feel a little ashamed of myself)

((because it's really stupid))

Man, Fuck...

Charles Murray

Get a Load of This Bunch of Assholes

Community supports bigoted, hatemongering principal:

http://www.nwfdailynews.com/news/davis_10423___article.html/gay_students.html

"David Davis is a fine man and good principal, and we are a gentle, peaceful, Christian, family-oriented community," said Bill Griffin, 73 and a lifelong Ponce de Leon resident who is no relation to the district superintendent. "We aren't out to tar and feather anyone."

Except of course when that is EXACTLY what's been done. Oh, and:

"He went so far as to lift the shirts of female students to insure the letters 'GP' or the words 'Gay Pride' were not written on their bodies."

I Entreat You to Get Real

1. I decided to start an ongoing feature where I talk about the stuffs that's going on in my life. Psst: this post is it.

2. Went to my grandparents house today. We've been trying to go as much as we can, as a family, because my grandfather's been having a lot of health problems lately. They've both been going through a lot, especially this past week. It was a great visit nonetheless; my grandparents are not like "old people," and would rather talk about current events or pop culture than how today's kids are going to hell (I assume this is the primary topic of conversation for most older people). This aside, my grandfather told me that I, Melissa, look like Hedy Lamarr, which cracked up my brothers, who found the reference impossibly old-timey. It's much nicer than Mary Kate Olsen, whom some people have been comparing me to (and who I think looks like a bad smell).

3. One of my newest favorite things is KZSU's "Entitled Opinions" show, which I listen to on podcast. Basically it's like going into your gabbiest professor's office, and they and their scholar friend talk Isaac Babel or Hannah Arendt at you for an hour. It's always academic, and frequently quite dense, but always absorbing. I haven't been listening to anything else for about a week (except for an annoying Cynthia Ozick interview; man, fuck Cynthia Ozick).

4. I'm currently reading "Of Human Bondage" by W. Somerset Maugham. MORE ON THAT LATER.

5. My DVD of Pierrot le Fou arrived!



Don't let my reluctance to bare my teeth* fool you; I am VERY excited to get this! Perfect end-of-summer movie.

And my Criterion postcard? Lindsay Anderson's if.... I remember my Dad referencing this one to me when I was a kid. I think I was watching the re-make of Fantasy Island and he was horrified that this is what Malcolm McDowell was reduced to. "I remember when he played the guy who ran into a school and shot all of the students, because that was better than being brainwashed." I haven't seen if... (I could tell it freaked him out), but it's hilarious and utterly incongruous to me that my Dad once saw it. Not that he was uncool (at all, he was really rad), but he was my dad, because he died my perception of him is frozen at what it was when I was thirteen.

6. All I am watching these days is Venture Brothers, Project Runway, and Mad Men. Holy mother of God do I love Mad Men, like all reasonably smart people with reasonably good taste.

7. Got Dark Chocolate-Dipped Creme de Menthe Altoids. I was reticent to buy candy but I got burned by the Elvis Peanut Butter and Banana Reece's Cups by waiting too long (I had planned to save them for posterity). They are delicious, 7.5 calories each, and have already melted inside their tin into a honeycomb shape. Oh, August.

8. Speaking of candy, this may ruin your life, but I can't help but share it. Hershey's has started selling some of their candy "fresh from the factory." We've gotten the Reece's and the Paydays before, and it's enough to make you want to cry.

9. Last five movies I saw: Little Murders, Persepolis, Pineapple Express, Band of Outsiders, and The Thief of Baghdad. All were great.

10. Gilbert Arenas might be getting his own reality show. HIBACHI! I wholeheartedly approve of this.

11. I saw the Passport to Washington, DC, and not only did they have Ben's Chili Bowl, THERE WAS A COOL DISCO DAN REFERENCE!!! AHHH!!! Sadly, no gogo, which is one of my favorite pillars of DC culture.

*I have a small gap.

Spaghetti Cat

Not only is the cat eating spaghetti, he/she appears to be clothed.

rabbit

1950s reading primers+a religion forgotten by time+crack=

Pineapple Express

This might be the funniest movie I've ever seen in my life. That sounds so wrong, so off. Surely there's another one I'm forgetting about, but nothing is coming to mind. And YES I know that my opinion is suspect because I've been talking up "Hot Rod" for the past nine months, but much like the sharply-dressed guy on this season's "Project Runway," I have impeccable taste (wait, bad example). Overall my favorite movies include The Third Man, Pierrot le Fou, Rushmore, George Washington, and The Night of the Hunter, all of which are renowned by many people who are notoriously not dopes. Anyway, this is for funniest, not best all-around (although PE is well-made). In other words, the most LOLs-per-minute.

All right, enough formalities. I had hoped against hope that I would even like this movie. I thought that Knocked Up was fairly sexist, depressing, and not particularly funny, and I didn't really care for Superbad either (for the record, I loved Freaks and Geeks and thought that 40 Year Old Virgin was good, if exhaustingly raunchy). But David Gordon Green is my favorite director (if you haven't already, find his 2000 debut George Washington), so I had some hope, even though he's never really directed a comedy before.

I had nothing to worry about. Pretty much nonstop I was laughing, at various levels, ranging from a jar of pickles to whenever Danny McBride or Craig Robinson was on screen. But James Franco is the best part; he's a really, really good comedic actor, and fucking superhot, even as a really rather dirty and gross pot dealer. I think that DGG is the reason the movie's so good, though. It's hard to describe, but his touches are everywhere, and on a dialectical level, I recognized a lot of the films he cited as inspiration when he started working on the project (like Thunderbolt and Lightfoot, another balls-out bizarre action/comedy). He seems to understand that comedy is fundamentally about surprise, and knew how to manipulate his own beautifully strange, dreamlike style into the tired form of the pot comedy, to make something fresh. It makes me really sad that his version of A Confederacy of Dunces (with Will Ferrell as Ignatius!) got stalled, because PE strongly suggests that he'd have done the book right.

The Drivers Licensing System in Maryland Is Inefficient

My brother is currently doing his in-car, which is designed for people polishing their skills. Many parents (ours) do not know this, and do not accept it as such. For some reason, the system has shifted from teaching people how to drive in high schools to having parents, essentially alone, teach their teenagers. This is why there is a decline in young people getting their license, not because of the graduated license restrictions. The restrictions are merely how teenagers justify their lack of a license to their buds and telephone pollers.

Matt says "hi." He says to say that he is doing two-a-days.

Thoughts?

http://www.rundc08.com/SHOP.html

Nationals Stadium

I went to the new Nationals Stadium last night. Had a half-smoke and got a free tee-shirt. Sat in front of some loud New Yorkers. The game itself was really good--the whole time it was either down to one run or tied (Nats still lost), a bat got smashed, another bat got thrown, there was a dodged ball, a fight between the manager and the umpires, and two yellow cards.

Things I Like? This Is Them

When I saw this my eyes flew out of my head, expanded to many times their natural size, while remaining attached to my head on narrow spindly stalks. Meanwhile, my body flew out behind me, generating some clouds of dust. From nowhere in particular a "BOI-YOI-YOI-OING" sound emanated.

One day I will compile a list of the things that I like. A rough, partial list would include coffee, comedic media produced by British people, mint-flavored food, Godard and his films, Achewood, Slavoj Zizek, bubble tea, Rehoboth Beach, not being in love, Washington, DC, baby platypuses, baking, Whole Foods, Proust, David Gordon Green, Taoism, Bertrand Russell, hushpuppies, Italian (language), French (language), Isaac Grunewald, and of course hilarious jokes. Things like that book rank very, very high indeed.

(found on Very Short List)

Pez Takes a Stand

Pez Takes a Stand
Originally uploaded by MJG1984

Taken from Pez's online store:

http://www.pez.com/category_s/1150.htm

Y'all Can't Stop Me Postin' about Slavoj Zizek

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2008/aug/09/slavoj.zizek

What does love feel like?

Like a great misfortune, a monstrous parasite, a permanent state of emergency that ruins all small pleasures.

I can't possibly agree more.

Tas Man

This makes Tasmania look both unutterably lovely and kind of cool. All I know about Tasmania is that in Australia is that the stereotype is that they have sex with their cousins (like our West Virginia) and they killed all of their aborigines.

...

http://www.kraftfoods.com/kf/recipes/classic-layered-salad-106311.aspx

Good Cat Names

Dan
Jimmy
Fritz
Beulah

I Can't Explain Why I Love This So Much

http://www.telescopictext.com/

Go For It, Everybody

Me included

Smith Island

Smith Island, Maryland is home to a peculiar accent that's managed to stay English-sounding (specifically West Country, that is, Cornwall, Devon, etc.) since the island was first settled by the British in the 17th century, and the above clip features a few speakers of it.

Also, ignore that horse's ass of an anchorman at the end. The one who makes the butter crack. I bet he's not even from Maryland anyway.

Great Things Going

http://www.bookforum.com/

Bookforum's blog.

My Opinion of Food Network's "Good Eats"

Sometimes I like this show OK, but I understand if you don't.

Here's Today's Post. It's the Best I Could Do Because I Am Under the Weather

In The Dark Knight note that the Joker calls himself a "victim" while Batman is interrogating him. It's when he chides Batman for throwing his head into the table, which he states is unwise as it makes the "victim's" head "all fuzzy."

Fuckers That Are on My Shit List

He knows why. It is serious business.

My Favorite Hot Rod Quotes

"Pools are great for holding water."

"No shit!"

"That's stupid."

"Balls, man! We just ran over a tiny bus!"

"The bathroom here is nuts."

"This is my hat. This is totally my hat."

"I'm gonna be honest with you, Rod. You look like a giant eagle with fire all around you and you've got a mountain for a face."

"You look pretty." "What?" "I said you look shitty. Goodnight Denise!"

"Seriously, man, this is one of the top-ten nicest things anybody has ever done for me. "

"I'm going in for a Vitamin Water, should I make that dos?" "No, I'm good, thanks." "Well, maybe I'll pick up a box of dong bags so we can knock boots later."

"HEY LITTLE GIRL! I DON'T WANT CHERRY IN MINE!"

(re some acid) "Well, I guess I'll do it."

I can't wait until "Hot Rod" is better appreciated.

Who Wins in Taco v. Grilled Cheese Sandwich?

"Wow. That's racist, but correct."

Letter to the Past

Melissa,

My god, start using leave-in cream on your hair asap. You will look terrific.

Melissa

Hellzlacious Yeah

Robert Mitchum at Cannes

Secret Shames

1. I read Vanity Fair and Vogue, like, religiously.

2. Because I no longer eat like I once did (i.e. a sensate vacuum hose), I look at pictures of the food I want to eat on Flickr (don't you DARE begin to judge me). Recent searches include guacamole, chimichangas, and movie popcorn (which I don't even really like).

3. I've never read Middlemarch. I own it; I just haven't gotten around to it. It's supposed to be pretty good, right?

4. I regularly watch Real Time with Bill Maher.

It's All Been Fucked Up In My Face

I forgot to post yesterday. Sorry. I had a really bad day, if that matters.

Doggs of Mine

Slavoj Zizek

Look at him, beached up there on that hotel bed like a logy walrus, his hairy tits pointed east and west, probably saying that Jennifer Aniston's character in The Break-Up was a terrorist or some other such crazyballs-yet-true thing. Talk about the real deal. Can you imagine if he had a blog? I bet it would be half treatises on how Stalin didn't go far enough and half LOLcats.

This Sucks

1. My Best Show Fun Pack got here yesterday. I got a wrinkled poster, a Patton Oswalt CD (featuring PO at his best and worst), a FMU shirt, a "Scar-Face" "Get Ready To Meet My Little Friend" shirt, and a sticker.

2. I am such a terrible blogger. I start these things up intending to be honest and actually talk about my life, but then when I get down to it, I type something out and it all looks so insubstantial. "Who wants to hear about your stupid life and what you have to say about it, you ugly, stupid sea cow?" These are all valid points, so I abandon my efforts to check my Google Reader or see if I have any new podcasts.

3. Here is what I am reading:



That's "Everything is Cinema: The Working Life of Jean-Luc Godard" by Richard Brody. I would have flipped the picture but then you would have made assumptions about which is my dominant hand. You can see my dilemma.

4. Here is what I am listening to:





Goddamn nothing! I haven't heard anything since the Los Campesinos! record, and the new Jay Reatard was a disappointment. Oh, and in "Melissa Gets To It Way, Way, Way, Way Too Late News" I just got into The Jam. It finally clicked. What was wrong with me? I am such a creep.

5. Here is what I am watching:

Mad Men, Venture Brothers, The Tomorrow Show with Tom Snyder on DVD.

Hol' up, I gotta say something about The Tomorrow Show. I watched one last night where he interviews Tom Wolfe and it may as well have been a conversation between my grandma and herself. Everything was "back when we were young, boys didn't dress like fags (or "wimps" or "weenies" as Tom S. and Tom W. respectively put it) and America is really great because people from all over the world want to come here and 'working class' people can still afford $50 flying lessons."

A New Age Dawns

I've decided to blog every day for a month, and for an excellent reason, too*. Luckily, I've actually got some things to say, so get ready for that. All you'll get today is this site I found (Zizek is my boy) which has the coolest loading I've ever seen. It unfolds like the title sequence of a Godard film.

*"Why the fuck not?"

This Guy Is an Awesome Guy

America is FUCKED.

Favorite Moment of "The Dark Knight" (spoiler)

When Gordon is promoted and after all of the cops finish congratulating him, you see (and hear) the Joker's slow, sarcastic clapping. "Oh yeah, you're here too," the audience and police officers say together. And it's all because of him that Gordon got to be promoted in the first place. Very funny and creepy.

I also liked when things esploded.

I AM BACK FROM VACATION; A LESSON AND A BIOGRAPHICAL NOTE

I've returned from my vacation. I had a very nice time.

Now,

The Lesson: you are required to go to a proctologist even if your problem is merely near your rear end.

The Biographical Note: my proctologist's surname is one double-consonant away from the German word for Satan (woland and wolland).

I Am Going On a Trip

No reason to get excited; it's just to the Maryland Shore. But I'll be back with a full report by the Sunday after next.

This feels a bit scanty. What else is news? I've been reading tons of Achewood lately. I listen to more Joy Division than a grown-ass woman probably should. I had another health scare (am OK now). I REALLY want to try those Chocolate Dunkers things from Pizza Hut, against every ounce of my better judgment. And I learned an awesome new word: mamihlapinatapai. It means "a look shared by two people with each wishing that the other will initiate something that both desire but which neither one wants to start," and comes from the Yaghan language of Tierra del Fuego (let it never be said that human beings aren't all basically the same--go on, let it!).

FWIW, This is my favorite Achewood:

http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=02062004

Polar Bear Safari

Yes, this is real. Amazing. It costs a nut and a leg, but it proves that there is still good left in the world.

http://www.tundrabuggy.com/

I Am Back; No, "Kid Nation" Did Not Get Renewed

Hi,

I am back to regular blogging at this site for now (that is, until I figure out Wordpress; yes I am that dumb). I have been waiting to do this for several weeks ow, because I wanted my blog's rene to be the same as America's birthday, because they are as important as each other*.

Anyway: yes, it's the 4th of July, and apparently rainy. I am with my family today, and we had planned a trip to Annapolis. Now we're just sitting around. I made cupcakes, watched the new "Venture Brothers," and read a bunch of back "Achewood."

What else? I've been reading "The Master and Margarita." Oh my god. This is so good. I can't remember the last time I've read something so...greedily. And this after "Kidnapped," which was...not for me. Turns out it is strictly for 13 year old boys in the 1880s. "The Master and Margarita" is for ME, NOW.

*Nothing in this sentence is true except that they are words used by many to express thoughts, veracious or no.